CRITICIZING PURPOSE IS SO AVERAGE ADMAN. SO I MADE A POST ABOUT IT, TOO.
The planet’s melting. Democracies are glitching. Billionaires are launching themselves into space while your cousin can’t afford rent.
And somewhere in the middle of this dystopian musical…
your snack brand drops a climate-positive tortilla chip.
Because in the face of global collapse, what we need isn’t policy or action.
It’s branded content.
Short-form. Optimized. Shot in 4K with subtle lens flares and a whispered voiceover that says:
“We believe in better.”
Humanity is crumbling under environmental, societal, and economic pressure…
and brands are showing up with moodboards.
Ticking boxes. Chasing KPIs.
Launching Purpose™ like it’s a limited-edition product drop.
And sure—some brands do try.
Patagonia. Dove. Ben & Jerry’s.
The Holy Trinity of Case Study Slides.
But for every one of them, there are a thousand others trying to solve systemic inequality with a seasonal hashtag and a DE&I panel moderated by their Head of HR.
We keep saying brands have power.
That they should lead society toward change.
But most can’t even lead their own creative approval process without a nine-person Zoom and a six-week delay.
Still, the narrative persists:
“Your brand can be a catalyst for good.”
Translation: Make it look like you care—but not enough to scare shareholders.
Because real change?
That’s hard.
It’s messy.
It’s not A/B tested.
Want to change the world?
Start by paying your interns.
Then maybe don’t brief your creative team to solve racism in 48 hours with a stock image and a pun.
Let’s be honest:
Half of us only discovered social issues existed when your intern suggested a Pride post in 2018.
But now?
You’re here to save the world.
One climate-positive oat milk collab at a time.
Unless your brand is doing more than launching a new SKU with a recycled manifesto…
you’re not fixing anything.
You’re cosplaying impact.
We don’t need more brands pretending to be saviors.
We need fewer pretending they’re not part of the problem.
But still, in my next brief, I’ll probably drop another Purpose Capsule™.
Call it Hope 2.0.
Put it on a tote bag.
Sell it for €101.
(visit store for actual price)
Because if the world’s going down…
you might as well monetize the fall.
So sure—I’ll slap a purpose line under my logo. It’s cheaper than therapy..
And then what happened? As I finish “writing” this article. Chat GTP asks me: Do you want me to write a new article titled How to Save the World in 6 Paid Posts or Less”?
